Apesal kau ni?

Sehabis petang.

Duduk.










Tak senang duduk.

Study? Lek jap.


argh!
Myspace tak best
Friendster tak best
hi5 tak best
facebook tak best
Gaming pun dah tak rasa excited~ hmm.

Serba tak kena.







Semalam YM bersama Paden.
mood aku: memang tengah gila, serba tak kena.
mood paden: lesu. fikir pasal test di awal pagi nanti.

Aku dan dia berborak. eh, tak la borak sangat. Tapi aku sangat boooooosan tahap yang.. ishk. Entah lah. Sian Paden, menjadi mangsa (kena layan aku yang kurang stabil mental dan emosi seketika)

Wops. Sorry Padennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.
*hugs*



Aku hari ini................... masih mencari sesuatu untuk dilakukan.
What is my hobby??

Swirl First.

I nearly forgot that I have to attend my cousin's engagement.
*slap you* for not reminding me!


BTW, she looked so beautiful. Seriously, She was like.. a princess. I was pretty confused.. "Is she getting married or engaged?"

The crown thing, the make-ups, the glow on her face :) hehe, nah, just a bit teasing between sisters.

As usual, the cousin, Yoy, and I, have our 'responsibilties'. HAHAHAHA! He's the V-man (Video) and I'm err, err, holding camera. I'll look smarter with Nikon or Olympus or whatever it is. HAH! So, I snap the happy moments. The conversation between folks. The crying babies, which is my favourite part. KEH! andddddd cam-whoring arounddddd, OF COURSE.

You know I usually just get myself done with abit of glossy lips and eye-liner. The Cousin of my-future-not-called-bachelorette-anymore cousin, sat infront of me and, tadaaaaaaaa..

"You wanna some make-ups? Let me."

I just sat infront of her.~

..She opened up her Sunsilk brand eye shadow and put on mine... and and... and.. done!

"TQ!" I said.
Then, I looked at the mirror, I'm so tanned or dark OR gelap in more accurate way to define my skin tone if compared with my cousin! HAHAHA. With the compact she used, I think that my face have obvious color tone with my neck! HAHAHAHA. That's the reason I NEVER USE A COMPACT POWDER!

But I like the way she made up my eyes. Eventhough I have little, skippy, eyes, I looked a bit fab than before. :p

Hah, tiring days. I'll upload pictures later. Am not putting 100% pictiures in this blog. -penat doh nak tekan satu-satu!

..................................................................
Ohhhhh, Again, My bad forgotten this one.
I would like to share about the whole pre-marriage things.
I've never been into, I mean, watch closely about this engangement process (even the Malay culture / adat itself. LOL.)*hit!*

So start with merisik, to ask if the girl is taken or what.*bring ring?

Then, bertunang, which means engage with the girl, the guy's side will come to the girl's house.. with alot of... dulang?.. *bring ring again??

Then, Nikah, Marriage. With Lafaz, U'll be his. * we have another ring or not??
Then.. Walimatul Urus. yang korang paling suka la.. makan2.

So, My cousin is going to be a future wife. I mean, she'll get into LIFE CONTRACT!

I don't know. I don't know. Okay, just say.. uhm, I'm okay seeing people married and so the things up and down. However, I always thinking that ..

"I'm not ready to be your slave". I have no ideeeeeeeeeea why I keep thiking of that. Of course, Marriage is beautiful. but then, I have dreams, dreams and hopes that I keep and promised to myself that I'm going to achieved! Yes, I'm being ambitious. It's not a matter.

Wait, the matter is, I don't like being asked to do this and that, and always serve him alone, ugh, whatever it is. I used to be in the 'zone'. My zone. I know the time will tell or I'd changed then.

I'm soooooooooo afraid of people changing into worse! Like, When you're lovebirds, he is always by your side, pay for you, cook for you, hug you, and everything like prince charming, butttttt then, things change, the guy whether is flirt, or he has some bad disease or the guy couldn't satisfy youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu (in many ways!) , then, ha. My mind is running .. running.. think as far as I could, as possible as I would?!

Still, I shared this with my mother and she said something or nothing.
But, I still have this paranoia.
If you see me with any guy, he's a friend of mine.
If you see me holding hand with a guy, I would say he attracts me. ( tak jujur betol. biar la!)
If you see me kissing with this current guy, It is soooooooooo IMPOSSIBLE TO HAPPEN!
YOUR HEAD AHH! WANT TO DIE AA?!
I'm not up into any kind of relationship with any guy except for friendship.


okay, stop thinking that I have problem with guys.
It's just about TRUST.

Thank you.